The Road Towards Humility

I never used to think that I was proud. That was until a good friend pointed out to me that in actual fact, I was very proud indeed. I was perplexed by this observation, and could not see how I had let pride get the better of me. I am forever thankful though for this good counsel, as in the years since I have been more readily able to see myself “puffing up”.

Pride is a very dangerous sin. One that none of us is immune to. Pride is ugly.

On the other hand to be humble is to be like Our Lord Himself. He said “Shoulder my yoke and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” (Matthew 11:29)  Jesus who was so humble, so humiliated teaches us much.  St Paul writes “In your minds you must be the same as Christ Jesus:  His state was divine, yet he did not cling to his equality with God but emptied himself to assume the condition of a slave, and became as men are; and being as all men are, he was humbler yet, even to accepting death, death on a cross.” (Philippians 2:5-8)

Where pride divides, humility unites.  Where pride hurts others, humility heals.  Where pride holds grudges, humility forgives.

Becoming humble is a daily struggle.  With every new interaction with another, every new situation, every thought that passes through the mind, pride must be stamped out quickly.

Humility and obedience are the two virtues that I see in the saints.  They are the two virtues Jesus shows us in His ultimate sacrifice for our transgressions.   They are the two main virtues that the Saints seem to always have in abundance.

These 40 days of prayer, fasting and almsgiving are a great time to stamp out pride in our lives and to learn obedience, forgiveness and just how “little” we are.  For it is only through God that we have life.  It is only through God that we have the ability to do anything at all.

To help us all on our Road towards Humility here are some great pearls of wisdom from the Saints.

“If I love Jesus, I ought to resemble Him.  If I love Jesus, I ought to love what He loves, what He prefers to all else:  humility.”  St Peter Julian Eymard (1811-1868)

“You aspire to great things?  Begin with little ones.  You desire to erect a very high building?  Think first of the foundation of humility.  The higher one intends it, the deeper must the foundations be laid.”  St Augustine (354-430)

“If we possessed every virtue, but lacked humility, those virtues would be without root and would not last.”  St Vincent de Paul (1580-1660)

“Believe that others are better than you in the depths of their souls, although outwardly you may appear better than they.”  St Augustine (354-430)

“We must never glance at what is good in ourselves, much less ponder over it, but we should search out what is wrong and what is lacking.  This is an excellent way of remaining humble.”  St Vincent de Paul (1580-1660)

“That man is truly humble who converts humiliation into humility.” St Bernard (1090-1153)

“Be careful to give no credit to yourself for anything; if you do, you are stealing from God, to whom alone every good thing is due.” St Vincent de Paul (1580-1660)

Learning to Trust God

We are currently trying to sell our house.  We live in a small rural town north of Auckland, on the main highway of New Zealand.  Needless to say, we get quite a bit of traffic, and plenty of stock and logging trucks rumbling past our front door every day! 

But it’s lovely here.  Our house was built in the 1960s for the Secretary of the Dairy Board.  Many people around here remember it being built.  It’s a lovely big house, grand in its own way.  Just perfect for all the children.  And I’ll be sad to let it go.  I’ll also miss the cows that hang out at our back fence.

However, it’s time to move on.  My husband works in Auckland now and it takes him 1 3/4 hours to get there and the same back again.  He has taken to staying one or two nights at a time and then coming home for a night.  This is hard for everyone, but particularly for the children who miss him so much when he is gone.

There’s been a fair amount of interest in the house – considering it can take anywhere up to a year for most houses to sell around here.  (In fact, some have been on the market for 3+ years).  Because we feel confident that this move is what God is asking of our family right now, we are hoping (praying) that the house will sell quicker than the average.

There is always the hope every day that someone will want to come and have a look.  So every day I get up and do the same round of housework, making everything tidy and clean (better than usual and boy do I like it)!

Every day I have an endless litany of “please send a buyer today Lord, please send a buyer today Lord”.  I know I sound just like a child with the thought that if I keep pestering enough then God will eventually give in, send someone along who is going to pay exactly what we want and all will be well!

And you know what, he does send people.  Just enough to keep us going and know that somebody is interested enough to come and have a look.  Just enough for us to know that yes, He is listening, He does know our need, but that He knows best and it will happen in His own good time.

Meanwhile, I need to learn to trust.  To have patience (when will I learn that virtue?)  To accept that there may be a reason why we must wait just a little bit longer.

I am reminded of the Scripture

“Set your hearts on his kingdom first, and on his righteousness, and all these other things will be given you as well.”  Matthew 6:33

The house, I keep telling myself, is just a temporal thing.  Yes, it’s necessary for us, we need a roof over our heads, (and I confess, I do like a nice house), but it is not as important as keeping focused on God.  The whole point of this move is to serve Him better through working more fully in the pro-life movement.  It would be a shame to loose sight of that now and get too caught up in the trivial side of things.

In fact, Jesus promises us that all that we need (not want) will be given to us if we just keep our hearts united with His.

And you know, in the moments I manage to trust God entirely, everything else fades away and there is a peace.  A quiet, accepting peace.

Remembering Familiaris Consortio

As this blog’s name is inspired by the words of Blessed John Paul II in his apostolic exhortation Familiaris Consortio, I thought I would share here a blog post I recently wrote for Family Life International NZ.

Thirty years ago, Blessed John Paul II wrote a letter exhorting the Christian family.  That apostolic exhortation was “Familiaris Consortio”or “The Role of the Christian Family in the Modern World”.

Three decades have passed since its writing, and the wisdom contained within its pages is just as relevant, if not even more so.  This exhortation is a great reflection on marriage, the family, the Church and society.

For today’s parents who have not yet read this document, I encourage you to do so.  There is a whole generation of families who could now benefit from reflecting on the words that Blessed John Paul II gave to us regarding the family…  (continue reading here)

The Value of Books

We have just put our house on the market and I have been a very busy beaver tidying, cleaning and clearing away clutter. One of the hardest jobs has been going through the book shelves and culling my (as I have discovered) wonderful collection of books.

In this day and age when it is so easy to access information on the internet, it is not often that I need to turn to my books.  So dusting the covers was a real joy as I discovered titles that I once enjoyed (and many whose words I have yet to read)!

I have a very old copy of “Emma” given to me by my Godmother on the occasion of my Confirmation.  Not a first edition, but it was hers as a youngster, and I will treasure it always.  There are quite a number of parenting books – some which I have read cover to cover, and others which I must read.  Books on Blessed John Paul II and others written by him, Lives of the Saints and a real treasure trove of pro-life titles.

These books will be around for as long as I wish to keep them in my possession.  The wisdom contained within those covers – new and old – is there for the taking.  While searching on Google is great for getting instant information and enjoyment, books hold secrets that can only be unlocked by opening the cover.

While, books are available to download, I am certain there will always be a place for the humble hand-held, page-turning book.  I hope in our new home, we will be able to make a space just for our great collection of books, so that we can all make the most of this awesome treasure!

Life, Faith and Family

I have been busy blogging over at thefridayfocus.wordpress.com. You can view my bogging posts by following this link.  The postings are on pro-life topics, including euthanasia which is being debated in the media again right now.  I hope you can join me over there, and I will try and find the time to write something for my own blog shortly.

 

“As the family goes, so goes the nation and so goes the whole world in which we live.” ~Blessed John Paul II~

Living the Gospel of Life

As long as I can remember I have been involved in the pro-life movement.  I can remember standing outside Epsom Day Clinic as a child while my mum and some friends prayed.  I knew babies died there, but not the detail.  Our family has been involved in Prayer Vigils, fundraising evenings for what was then SPUC, Life Chains and Operation Rescue.

In 1992 we were introduced to the great Apostle of Life Fr Paul Marx and his organisation Human Life International.  My mum, Colleen Bayer, started Family Life International NZ with the blessing of Fr Marx.  He continued to support her and the efforts of the whole FLI team here in New Zealand until the day he was taken to God.  (Although, I suspect that he is still doing so from the room God has prepared for him in Heaven).

For me, being pro-life has been a natural way to live my faith.  I cannot see how one can be a Christian and not be pro-life.  Yet, today so many seem to think they can pick and choose which truths they will accept, and those that they will not.

John Paul II in his encyclical Evangelium Vitae (The Gospel of Life) told us that “the Gospel of Life is both a great gift of God and an exacting task for humanity. …In giving life to man, God demands that he love, respect and promote life.” (#52)

Jesus himself showed us how sacred life is by becoming one of us, conceived by the Holy Spirit in the womb of his Mother Mary.  Yet, too many of us who confess to love God, think that it is okay to kill an innocent child in the womb because he or she has been diagnosed with Down Syndrome, or the child was conceived through rape or incest.  Maybe the Mum is very young, so abortion is okay for her.  Many have brought the lie that suffering is worthless and will advocate for euthanasia, or silently stand by while laws are introduced that allow doctors to kill their patients.

To be Christian is to be pro-life.  There is no other option.  Each of us is called to share the Gospel of Life because it is the very heart of Jesus’ message.  We are called to live it, to share it with everyone we meet.  For it is truely Good News.

Every one of us is called to pray, to speak when no one else will speak in defense of life, to support and promote the grassroots efforts of various pro-life organsiations.  There is no room for complacency for we are in a battle against death and we are a people of life and hope.

“Woe to you if you do not succeed in defending life.”

Blessed John Paul II, World Youth Day, Denver, 1993

The Equation of Sleep Deprivation

As a month of sleep deprived nights takes effect, the mind is getting muddled, the body is slow, achy and sluggish and I’m making mistakes that I don’t normally make. Luckily when I see that gorgeous little face, the fact that I keep nodding off to sleep while feeding the wee man (almost snapping my neck in the process) pales in significance as I realise just how precious a gift he is.

However, the same can not be said for bigger kids. I’m afraid my tolerance for being woken by those who should be able to get through the night on their own has long faded. I’ve taken to persuading my husband to letting any night wakers who cannot re-settle easily sleep with us or on the floor on an old cot mattress. This of course can backfire – especially with sleep talkers, flippers, moaners and snorers!

So I have taken some comfort in the Jennifer Fulwiler’s “The Parents’ Sleep Index:  How Tired do you Feel?” blog that she wrote recently.  In it Jennifer comes up with an equation for all sleep deprived parents and caregivers – because sometimes the hours of sleep you get really just doesn’t add up to how tired you really are!

Here is your answer to those who think that five hours sleep is sufficient when you’ve been woken three, four or even five times.  Read on you’ll be glad you did!

Is there anything more difficult than having a night where sleep is  not on the agenda for one or more of your kids? Wait, actually, there  is: When the number of hours of sleep you technically got does not come  anywhere near to representing the epic scale of your evening, and thus you do  not receive the proper amount of sympathy from the people around you. “Oh, six  hours, that’s not so bad,” your boss comments when you drag yourself into the  break room for your fifth cup of coffee.

As a service to parents everywhere, I have used my own hours of wakefulness  during the wee hours of the night to create a Sleep Index.  Read more here…